As I planned out today’s post, I had originally schedule something along the regular lines — something to encourage your faith in Christ. However, tomorrow is a special day in my life and I didn’t want to let it pass without recognition.
Tomorrow is my wedding anniversary. I’ll have been married for 12 years. Yay!
With such a momentous occasion, I thought that I would do the blogging thing and share 12 lessons I’ve learned from 12 years of marriage.
- Laughter helps just about every situation but only if you’re laughing together and not at each other.
- Marriage is easier when real communication happens.
- It’s important to learn to do things alone or individually. Spouses don’t have to be connected at all times.
- Take care of self. Physically, emotionally, spiritually. A spouse is a helpmate — not a repair man.
- You don’t always have to agree. Jay and I think very differently about a handful of things. That’s okay — especially if it really makes no difference.
- You don’t have to like the same things. Jay can’t paint and I really could not care less about the hundreds of trees or dogs he talks about. But…
- Encouragement is key. I may not understand his fascination with some stuff but I encourage him on his journey and he does the same for me.
- Establish a safe communication line and plan of action when a disagreement happens over a larger issue. This should be discussed before a larger issue arises.
- Have fun together. Make memories. Go places. Dance together — even if it’s bad.
- Talk about money. Yeah, it’s a sticky topic but it needs to be done and re-visited as goals and aspirations change.
- Don’t air your business to everyone. Don’t be the person at church who talks negatively about your spouse. Don’t share on social media the discussions, arguments, and other difficulties.
- Genuinely liking your spouse is vital. I don’t think I’ve shared about it here but we’ve finally closed our book on children. Failed pregnancies and lost adoptions have been constant companions these last four year. However, our marriage barely took a hit. We’ve changed, yes, but through the process we communicated openly and, enjoyed each other, and – just as when we began – there’s no one I’d rather spend many alone hours with. 🙂